Is your Heart at Peace or at War? Resolving the Heart of the Conflict

During a recent Webinar that I co-facilitated, a participant asked me a question most of us have grappled with at some point in our careers:

How do I deal with a stakeholder that is nasty and argumentative?

My mind immediately went to: “Is your heart at Peace or at War”?

This is the foundational principle of the Anatomy of Peace, a book which is the story of Yusuf al-Falah, an Arab, and Avi Rozen, a Jew, each lost his father in the Arab-Israeli conflict.

When we approach a conflict, most often we do it with a heart that is full of anger and a mind that says “I am right”. This comes in the way of us being able to see the other person’s perspective, leading to a far deeper conflict.

The solution is really simple, when you walk into a conflict situation, you need to ask yourself, “do I really want to find a solution or do I want to be proven right”?

When you approach a conflict situation, ask yourself the following questions:
1.    What is it that I really want from this situation? What is my best case scenario?
2.    What could the other person be thinking, feeling, seeing, hearing?
3.    What can I do that could move the situations towards a resolution?

The next time you walk into a conflict, just ask yourself “Is my heart at peace or is at war”?

Read on & Try it…the results may surprise you !!!!!!!!!!!!